Do Your Updates, Part II

Bobbie1 Comment

Firstly: a new Apple iOS update is out for phones/pads/Macs, and you want to take it *as soon as possible*. Not only does it have a zero day in it, that zero day is under active exploit. This means that a problem is/was identified before a fix was identified (zero days to fix) and professionals are already abusing it (under active exploit). Granted, the typical target of these things are journalists, government officials, etc., but also folks working at corporate offices. Maybe even you.

One of the questions I have fielded since Do Your Updates is best distilled as “why can’t developers do it perfectly the first time”. Aside from the unrealistic expectation that an engineer not be human, there’s a few reasons for this.

  1. The biggest vulnerability in any system *is the humans* and it’s not just the humans building the system, it’s the humans *using* the system. Phishing and social engineering – those emails asking you to click a link urgently or telling you “here’s your PayPal receipt” for a transaction of several hundred dollars (designed to make you panic) are phishing. Social Engineering is more like the person calling you on the phone saying they’re calling from Chase to verify a recent fraudulent activity and asking you for things like your passcode, to verify a 2FA, etc. These methods rely on the target feeling *vulnerable* and have a sense of urgency.
  2. Code evolves and so does technology. There was a time where a very strong password was sufficient to guard your stuff — but then we had data breaches. So then we added 2FA (second-factor authentication, e.g., when you get a text with a code to support your log in) — but then we had SIM swapping. So then we added MFA (multi-factor authentication), physical YubiKeys, etc. etc. — for each fine cat, a fine rat: engineers on the malicious side are not resting, so engineers on the corporate side cannot, either.
  3. We talked about packages and post-deployment vulnerabilities in Do Your Updates. That is still a thing.
  4. There are *a lot* of ways an attacker can poke at the platform or the code:
    • They can insert things into text boxes for forms that interrupt the inbound form contents (e.g., the text box in which you give your feedback on a thing) to try to get into the database in which those contents exist (this can go by a variety of terms and also has a variety of methods, one of which is called SQL Injection and is/was the first thing I learned about cybersecurity, aside from “never share your password”, back in 2002).
    • They can do something called a “brute force” attack which is just like it sounds: employing a variety of clients to just pound the ever-loving crap out of any intake on a site to either force it to give up/let you in and/or just take the site down (Ddos: Deliberate denial of service). 2FA helps with this but so does throttling (making it so that only so many requests are allowed before it locks you out), or Captcha/Re-Captcha. Except now AI can pick out all the parts that are a “motorcycle” in the image, even if you can’t. And so now engineers have to figure out the difference between a less tech savvy person reaching for their paper-written passwords and typing those carefully but incorrectly into the little box, vs. an AI acting as such.
    • They can code up sites that *look* like the site you want to go to and the URL even looks like the site you want to go to — except maybe instead of a “O” it’s a “0” in the site name. You go to the site that looks legit, that the engineer has scraped/copied the design from a legitimate site, and you type. your login as always. Because it’s not the real site, it tells you “oh gosh we need to verify it’s you, please type in the 2FA code” and instead of you sending that code to the real site and doing a real authentication, you are providing that code to the attacker so they can go log in as you.

AI is also not going to solve our security problems — it will make them harder to (as malicious folks have access to AI, too)– but it can help. AI can be used to detect anomalies faster (in most cases you don’t have to tell your bank you are traveling as it employs AI to figure out whether or not that was you booking a 7 night trip to Cancun or not), or even predict patterns for exploits. When it does, it will not be replacing the engineer or even making what the engineer does perfect. This dance does not end.

So do your updates.

Burner

BobbieLeave a comment

I recently had the opportunity to travel internationally, and to test a few things. Namely, using a “burner” phone.

To be super clear: it is very hard to do this perfectly and I did not do it perfectly. We’ll discuss some hypotheticals further down, but I felt the need to start with that. This was a test, it was only a test, and it went pretty much how one could expect it to.

Why

There’s a lot of discourse in the media about phone confiscation, personal privacy, etc.; this shows up in articles hearing about journalists being issued “burner phones” or the advice to acquire one yourself before international travel. I wanted to see firstly how that would work and secondly, frankly, if I would actually need it. I am not the target demographic for the sort of privacy harassment (yet?) that would require a burner phone (I am not a journalist and I hold no real position of power) so the likelihood I was going to have to hand over my phone to a Cellebrite was small, but not zero. How painful, then, would a burner phone experience be?

Who

This phone was just for me, in my private travel, to talk with about ten people in two countries. The number, once acquired (see “How”), was shared with those people via What’s App and/or Signal. The phone wasn’t used by anyone else during this period.

When

The actual phone was acquired about 3 weeks before my trip which, with life being as busy as it is, did not leave me much time to set up the necessary infrastructure. The plan was to have it set up pre-trip, test it a bit, and then evaluate it for the trip.

How

There are the “right” ways to do this for “ultimate privacy” (and I put that in scare quotes for a reason) and then there are the “okay” ways to do this for like 80% of scenarios, and I went with that one. Firstly, you have to acquire a phone. You could, for example, revive an old one of yours or a family members’, or purchase one off of Swappa. I did the former, but for “perfect” you would ideally do a cash deal off-record for someone else’s phone. Once you have the phone, you need to install a phone plan. You could, in theory, get a prepaid phone plan through a different carrier and in some cases they don’t actually require an ID (as long as you’re paying with cash and/or a prepaid Visa card) but note that everything, on some level, is traceable. There’s cameras at the phone store, there’s call recording for the wireless provider, etc. I didn’t bother with that, I just added it to my current plan.

I will note here that adding a phone to your plan immediately gives it some tether to you. The phone, when added to my plan, got “my name”, and anyone with a warrant, or really good phishing, could probably divine that this “Bobbie Conti” on the phone plan is related to that “Bobbie Conti” on the phone plan. They can also then probably get that other phone number, and my address, which in turn means they would know already quite a bit about me. BUT, the *phone itself* doesn’t impart all of that – in order to get there you need to do that “hop” and either that warrant or phish. Moving on…

If you have an Apple phone – and for security reasons I prefer them – you are best placed to get an iCloud account, so you can load apps and suchlike. For that, you need at least an email address. For a Google email address, they like it if you have a backup email and a phone number for 2FA. So the phone comes first, but where do you get the 2nd email address? Proton mail. Armed with my new Proton mail, and then my phone number, I got a Gmail account and wired that all up to the Burner. Great! I now have a phone, with the ability to load apps, text, etc., that on the surface level isn’t “me”.

A really, really driven person would have gone to a public forum of some kind (e.g., Best Buy when busy and using their demo machines) and used their computer to set up the Proton Mail account, then gone to a second one several miles away to set up the Gmail account, and so forth. I did none of that, but I did use a VPN on the machine that I set them up with. That said, Google almost certainly was able to figure out it’s me, since the machine I logged into was the same machine I use my personal Gmail (note: my gmail is my spam hole and I do not use it for anything important).

From here I did some final tweaking and followed some basic principles:

  • I removed location services from all the things – including even weather.
  • I deleted a bunch of apps I did not need.
  • I installed Signal. Yes, What’s App was on there, too, but if one has to choose one chooses Signal.
  • I did NOT load up any other accounts (emails, etc.), and absolutely did not tether any cards/payment forms to the phone.
  • I brought my own chargers, charging cables, etc. and never hooked up to public USB, nor to any bluetooth.

This left me with a phone I could use to search the internet (Duck Duck Go for the win), send texts/Signals/WhatsApps, and… that’s about it.

A truly driven person would probably purchase, with cash, some Visa gift cards, load those up in the “wallet”, would add in one or more VPN’s, and would almost certainly have not used What’s App. I know what they say about What’s App being private. However, What’s App *can* read your texts if a recipient requests them to, e.g., if you’re getting reported for fraud or abuse. If they can do that under that circumstance, they can certainly do it under others. Additionally, What’s App shares data with other Meta products, so if you are traveling with others who use those, the proximity tracking (and more if those folks are your friends and taking pictures in which you may be, *tagged or otherwise*), it’s not much for them to figure it out.

What

What happened was an exercise in frustration for me, and not much else.

Not having access to “tap to pay”, location services (hello maps!), etc. meant for a substandard experience to the one I could have had, had I had my phone. Instead I relied on others and/or visual directions, and physically pulling out my card to tap it. It also meant I wasn’t getting health tracking benefits, etc. If I had been on a trip by myself and not with friends, the maps/location piece would have absolutely driven me nuts.

The phone itself received generic text message phishing (in this case offering a job), allowed me to text the group I was in, and that was about it. There was no case in which it was compromised, invaded, etc., and there was no indication that someone or thing actually cared about it (other than me). It’s hard to prove a negative, and as I said earlier, I’m not that important :).

The final curiosity was to see if it were to get plugged into the aforementioned Cellebrite on the return trip and… it wasn’t. Not a hint of it. In theory, an Apple phone equipped with Signal and not voluntarily unlocked is fairly “protected” (thus far) from Cellebrite forensics but nothing lasts forever and I would imagine that Cellebrite, having preemptively declared victory in the past only to have to walk back their words would, in future, not advertise a capability until proven. Still, the plan had been to see if any of the account information stored on the phone (with the new emails, etc.) were to show up elsewhere post-plug-in.

Addenda

You could fit the “what ifs” and caveats in this scenario into a small football stadium.

If the concern is a government acquiring the data to do things with it (whatever one might imagine those things to be) then it should be noted that so much of our data is available to JUST ANYONE at any time it’s scary. With a first name and last name, you can search court records, find addresses, see property tax records, etc. With a social security number (which, erm, the gov’t gives you), you can run a credit report, know where someone is banked, and (if again you are said government) know their income and income streams. The things the government would need a warrant (purportedly) for would be specific financial transaction information, and possibly what calls were made at what time and to whom and for how long. If one is to believe the news of the early oughts, the NSA is already listening in anyway. What is left, then, is texts to/from the device itself, the contents of which you have and the person to which you texted have; and either can be forced via warrant.

The other concern is non-government entities or government entities that are not your own and, in my case, again, I’m not that important :). I would imagine the same holes in the process apply to those, if not more. I also generally ascribe to the notion one should not say out loud anything one is not willing to defend in court or another public forum.

The core scenario in which we hear about burner phones (e.g., journalists) are different from mine – I don’t imagine journalists using tap to pay from a burner phone in the middle of a war zone and I don’t imagine foreign officials using said burner phone to send sensitive messages (or if so I imagine some sort of Mission Impossible self-destruct smoke thing happening). For their sakes I hope it works, but my own scenario is nothing so dire.

One should remember the name here, too: a burner phone is so named because when it ceases to be useful and/or is compromised, you burn it; the real purpose of a burner is to get a message from point A to point B and then discard it, hopefully with no traceability back to your thumbs.

You can donate to Signal here.

You can donate to Reporters without Borders here.

Now What, Part III

Bobbie1 Comment

They say history does not repeat itself but boy howdy does it rhyme. Another quarter, and another batch of layoffs. This builds on previous guidance.

If you are Leaving

Firstly, I am sorry. I really am. Go check out Now What, and Now What II, for some initial guidance (especially about that RIF package you may or may not have gotten).

Resume

In addition to everything else in those other pages, you will want to use modern tools for modern solutions. While I do not believe AI is a golden hammer, it *can* help you brush up that resume. The key here is to use it for *parts* and then review it and add your voice and finishing touches. Things to particularly pay attention to:

  • a concise summary at the top – by concise I mean 240-character-tweetable concise.
  • bulleted skills list.
  • tailoring to different role types that are adjacent – a given person is perfectly capable of being a Technical Program Manager or a Product Manager, but how you slant your resume will differ for those two roles.
  • clean design – you want enough white space to not make it cramped and not so much that it creates extra pages of reading or the eye falls off the page.

Before you send it out, triple check it for accuracy, and remove any “the user” or other phrases that signal AI use.

Networking

Find local chapters and meet-ups of folks who are in the same industry/specialty as you. Yep, meetup is still a thing, as is dev.events. You may be an introvert (Hi. It’s me. I’m an introvert.) but you’ll want to get out there and network – this can lead to consulting gigs, soft intros, expanding your LinkedIn (up next), etc.

LinkedIn

OK I mean yes, you can post how you are/were impacted. And your feels. But after that you need to look at LinkedIn as a tool.

  • “Link” to those you worked with that you had a good working relationship with – because now you can see jobs that get posted on their pages, by *their* network.
  • Clean up your profile like you clean up your resume: get yourself a headline, an “about” section, make sure your experience and skills are up to date.
  • Did you know you can set the “Open to Work” feature to Recruiters only?
  • Use it to find companies that say they are hiring (more on that later). When you reach out to recruiters or folks hiring, add a short note about why you’re messaging them (personalize it). It will help you stand out.
  • Take a look at your post history – is there anything there that *might* give a recruiter or a company second thoughts? I’m of a “hey if I say it at all I will shout it in a public square” mentality, but not all are.

Job Hunting

Indeed, LinkedIn, etc. all post roles that are “open”. I say “open” because you know and I know that some organizations aren’t great about their job posting hygiene, leave roles online that have been filled, or (in some cases) have “ghost” roles open. You don’t want those, you want real jobs.

If you can, look at the posting date. Focus more on applying to things posted sooner to “now”, than older. Those are less likely to be well into the interview and/or hiring process, and more likely to be legitimate and still funded.

If you know someone who works at that company, reach out to them and ask them for a soft intro to the hiring manager, or a referral.

Stress Management

Touch grass. I’m serious: go out for a walk, make sure you’re hydrated, and so forth; this is a stressful time and stress management is going to be a requirement, because stress can impact a lot of things including your immune system. You don’t want that.

If you are Left

Yes, this sucks for you too; go see “Closure“.

LinkedIn

You get LinkedIn homework too.

  • Find the folks you know are impacted, that you have a good working relationship with them, and “Link” them. This gives them an extended network and exposes them to more opportunities.
  • As fellow Linkies post jobs available, repost them. You don’t have to add your thoughts if you don’t want to, but reposting them extends the visibility of the opening through *your* network directly.
  • For closer impacted folks, you can help them eyeball their resume. Sometimes when you’re in the thick of a role you don’t realize all that you do, so you can be that “realizer” for your impacted friends.

Referrals

  • If your company has open positions, offer referrals for those you know would be a good fit. Referrals may sometimes feel like a black hole via the “system”, so if you can (without too much political capital) reach out to the hiring manager of the role your fellow Linkie is applying for, that can absolutely help.
  • If a position has been open for longer than 2 weeks, *definitely* check with the hiring manager if you can before referring. In the current market, that role is likely already filled or deeply in the hiring process, and it may be too late.

Stress Management

This applies to you, too. Both from a survivor’s guilt perspective, but also from a “there’s bound to be a shuffle in the work structure or the workload”. Try to maintain good sleep hygiene, get some cardio, and stay hydrated, because it’s going to be icky for a bit as you juggle what you see online and what you experience at work.

Deep breaths, and do the best you can, with what you have.

Ripping

BobbieLeave a comment

Ask any sewist or person who works with fabric what their feelings are about their seam ripper, and they will either tell you it’s complicated or that it’s their favorite. Most of us think it’s complicated.

A seam ripper is a little tool with a sharpish-hooked edge that you use to rip seams (“it’s that easy!”). “Ripping” sounds more violent than it is — it cuts through the threads that hold the seam together whilst (mostly) preserving the fabric on either side and is used for either letting you take something that wasn’t right for you and make it right for you, or for tearing out a mistake.

In knitting, if you have to do that it’s called “frogging” and it’s where you yank the yarn free of the needles and, row by row, disassemble the knit into an unwieldy pile of yarn.

For the most part, NO ONE is having a good time doing these things. At the very best, these are an impedance to actual progress, a necessary correction on the way to doing the thing you actually wanted to do. More often, they are an admission of error, and a painstaking reminder at that. By the time you are frogging or ripping seams, you are watching as you undo dozens, perhaps scores of hours of work. It hurts.

At the very least, though, you have control – you can choose to let the seams stay as-they-are, or you can choose to undo them and refashion them into something you want — but you choose. If you’re one of the thousands laid off last week — or millions over the last year — you didn’t get to choose (or likely didn’t). You have been forced into a Very Large and Very Painful change.

I’ve got some older posts on the practicalities of handling this situation but for the most part they do not address one of the more problematic aspects: what if you’re old?

I speak as someone who is “old”. At least, considered “old” in the workforce for technology: this year I will be 52. With the power of hair dye and wrinkle cream and soft focus and carefully applied makeup I may still be “looking” mid 40’s but the reality is I’ve been in the corporate workforce now for 32 years.

Mind you, “age” isn’t a problem for the person who has it. *I* think my brain works just fine, thank you (or at least as fine as it did some 10 or 20 years ago), but the perception on the exterior could be that I am not as “fresh” as someone younger in career, or as “raw”. (Why do we use phraseology for candidates that we would for produce?). Older folks who have been hit by the layoffs are going to have a harder time getting a new job, and that can mean a forced early retirement or a forced early cliff in finances, neither of which sound great.

The irony is, of course, that we need people to be working as long as possible to support the infrastructure our government uses to support the *really old* people. With the largest generation — Boomers — retiring, the more of us Gen X-ers that can be kept in play, the better off “the system” will be. Gen-X has more in common with Millenials in terms of why we stay at a role, and while I don’t necessarily agree with everything in this infographic, I do think that our generation’s skeptical approach to most things — rebranded as “critical thinking” by the time I got into the workforce properly — is and proves to be quite useful.

Which is not to say the pain is solely borne by us “semi-olds”. Millenials are still paying off student loans while trying to hold a mortgage and save for their kids’ college. Gen Z are coming in with student debt and skyrocketing housing expenses. Getting yoinked out of your job, and also your health insurance, with no notice, is catastrophic. Sure, the unemployment rate — even today — isn’t as bad as it has been (the Great Recession and COVID both created huge spikes), but that is cold comfort to the person evaluating their current situation in what is hopefully a “garden leave” period.

This could be a post that tells one impacted to “buck up”, refashion that resume, pound the pavement, work your network, etc. There are plenty of those posts. This post is to acknowledge it sucks, and for some in a specific stage and circumstance, even if eventually they do get something bigger and better, it sucks hard.

Do your updates.

Bobbie2 Comments

Usually I try to figure out a pithy title as a draw, but for the love of whichever entities you respect and/or follow, please do your software updates. Specifically do your platform updates: on your iPhones/Pads/Macs, on your Windows machines. Update your apps. When the little red notification comes on, do not ignore it, just do it.

How to Update

(If you have other devices/platforms just use your handy dandy search engine — I use Duck Duck Go — to identify how to get your updates in a timely fashion. Bonus points if you set it up to automatically do it.)

Why Update

There are some that believe the updates are for feature funsies: e.g., if I update my phone I will get the new AI this or the new UI that. This is true, for most “regular” updates there are some feature releases and you get to read all about those (and decide if you like that or not). There are also “bug fixes”. I feel like this does disservice to what those fixes are: if I think of a “bug” I think of “annoying thing that happens”, I do not think of “wide open gaping hole for bad actors to waltz in through”.

Your platform updates often include security patches. These patches are, for the most part, NOT because the engineers made a mistake when crafting the platform, rather, they relied on packaged convenience libraries to do some standardized work and *it is those libraries* that have problems. Think of it like this: the engineers baked the cake, but the problem was hidden in the flour they used, and would not have been visible when they baked the cake and someone found out the flour had something in it long after the cake has been baked.

This happens *all the time*. There are thousands, probably millions of little packed up conveniences in the software world, because writing something *from scratch* takes a very long time and it’s kind of silly if someone has already done it (and done it so well that All the Other Kids are Using It). When a vulnerability is discovered in a package, it is given a CVE number (Common Vulnerabilities and Exposures), and a detailed write up on what the vulnerability is, where it is, and oftentimes suggestions on how to fix it. Companies worldwide use MITRE’s CVE database to understand what and where those vulnerabilities are, and how to fix them, so they can iteratively update their software and further secure it. Vulnerabilities are discovered by engineers around the world, sometimes on their own time, and sometimes on their company time: they are written up and shared with package users to make sure they get fixed.

How Bad Can it Be?

A vulnerability or exposure has roughly four stages of severity: low, medium, high, and critical. YOU as the consumer don’t really know which basket of vulnerabilities is addressed in “bug fixes”, but the company you depend on does: high and critical vulnerabilities, and their address, are often why you get off-cycle security patches (ever had an update on your phone that seemed awfully soon after the last one?). These vulnerabilities are “publicly disclosed”, meaning, their existence and how they can be exploited is also disclosed. The analogy here is: there’s a catalogue of all barn doors that are unlocked in your area, and anyone who uses those barns should be aware of that, and the barn owners should be aware of that, so the barn owner can lock the door. This also means that bad actors (who, let’s face it, are probably serially trying all the barn doors through the area anyway) who are lazy and did not do their homework now have a legit directory of which barns are probably unlocked.

Hence the haste.

These vulnerabilities are discovered and there is a Very Short Window in which the companies that use them can get a heads up on fixing them and getting those fixes out before they show up in the public discourse. (Meaning, the CVE doesn’t show up formally in the MITRE database until which time as the organizations and libraries dependent on fixing it have at least had a *chance* to fix it). This means that the original discoverer(s) of the exploit know how to break in, but it isn’t available to everyone else to see: that happens after (theoretically) everything has been fixed.

“Everything has been fixed”, in this case, means that your software has been patched and updated, *or you have been asked to do an update*.

If you wait, and the longer you wait, the more exposed you are.

Modern convenience often comes with modern inconvenience: we have computers that are smaller than our hand that literally tether to all global knowledge, they help us stay in communication with others and they help us track our lives and livelihoods. They also are fragile and need care and feeding, and it can be easy to defer it in light of convenience (“oh, I won’t do the update now because it will take too long, I’ll wait until ‘later'”). Please. Don’t wait until “later”.

And by extension…

BobbieLeave a comment

I’m tired. It’s mostly a good tired, like the tired you get after a long but positive (either in productivity or just vibes) day. It has the same quality as the soreness you get from working out really hard, not the soreness you get from twisting an ankle or (as time marches on) that appears to show up from nowhere. (My brother and I once had a conversation on “aging” as he is junior and so I try to keep him abreast of what is up next. I told him that after 45, it’s not so much “what’s going to hurt today”, as “what all is going to hurt today, and for how long”.)

I spent my middle and high school years daydreaming, and didn’t quite get my act together until the last year, really. The interesting thing there is that last year was absolutely STACKED with stuff– unlike previous years, I participated in after school activities (to the extent that I could). I took at least one honors class. I had a fully stacked babysitting calendar plus at least one job. I learned to scuba dive. I had a bunch of things piled on in a very short period with very real deadlines and it weirdly felt like the more I piled on the more I could do; if there wasn’t a lot to do then I just kinda fell back and daydreamed and read a lot. (Note to self: if you have or are a person who likes to retreat in fiction books to the possible detriment of their schoolwork, having 2000 books *in the house* by authors like Michener, Asimov, Niven, Heinlein, Herriot, etc. are going to get you more of that behavior). I don’t regret it (much).

This extended into college, coupled with the realization that the major I picked and the reality of the world were two different things. Keep in mind this was before the internet, and before you could access information with a few clicks: the understanding of what a science degree was, what it would actually get you, and what the process actually was to get somewhere, didn’t arrive until I got into UW and realized: no one was going to hand me a bunch of money and a boat to go study sharks. Or at least, not any time soon. That path was going to entail a Master’s Degree, and probably a Doctorate, and I was already not having a good time at school. I was working three jobs (all part time, I wasn’t crazy) but I wasn’t really attending to my schoolwork. I graduated and took the first employment that had a reasonable wage so I could eat and pay rent.

Fast forward some years (okay about 10 years) and I found myself a single parent with a “career”. It just sort of happened – I mean, yes, I went back to school for some stuff and yes I cajoled and pleaded and got job transfers and tried really hard – but I didn’t do anything like the LinkedIn signaling/go do networking type stuff one does today. This was nearly 20 years ago. I just kept reaching out for things that looked interesting enough, and that would pay me.

In that time I’ve continued the pattern of piling on things when it didn’t look like there was “enough”. Before I was a mom there was always a side hustle (in the late 90’s and early 2000’s, you could make some cash if you knew VBA and could get PowerPoint to do things it does easily now, like embed videos; you could also build websites. Most folks of my generation remembers a time when “everybody was a web designer”). After I became a mom there was always something too: PTA, library trips, sports, Boy Scouts, etc. As the offspring grew and became more independent, and I started having more “free” time, I would toss in other things: helping out a local nonprofit, running food drives, taking on extra work from actual work, etc. I felt better when there was lots to do, and a variety of it.

One time I was changing companies and took a week off between the two. This gave me something unusual in and of that I literally had *no job* for that week and so in preparation for that week I made a longish list in One Note of all the things I was going to do that week. But because it was in a list, and I saw the list, the bulk of that list was done before the week ever came. (Don’t fret tho: I replenished the list). That was when I first clued into the fact that *something* was driving me to Do Things and that I couldn’t “just sit still”. I mean, I had had friends point this out before – a meeting in Montreal where I was constantly making lists and bouncing my knee and my friend looked at me and said, “you can’t sit still, can you?” (she said it *really nicely*; it was more of an observation than an accusation) – but it’s different when you realize that it’s *true*.

I have this fantasy of having a “do nothing weekend” – where I do nothing. No housework, no obligations, certainly no work. Every time I block the calendar for this, and I tell the Husband person, and we vow this will happen for real this time; and every time something comes up. Usually because I thought “well it’s just one thing”. I signed up for a knitting class (I finally have the finger dexterity to knit in the round! It only took fifteen years), I go out and deadhead the garden, well and I can’t *not* lift, etc. I get to Sunday and look back at a “do nothing weekend” in which I have indeed done something — usually many somethings — and I am tired. Yet here I sit, looking at my calendar for the week, the month, and the year — thinking “oh I can squeeze in more. I wonder if XYZ needs help? Or maybe I should plan out ABC?”

There is a part of my brain that is constantly looking for things to do and wanting the reassurance of relevance and purpose. It chooses to jam stuff into the “schedule” in a Tetris-like fashion, because it knows that if it does not and if I do not have enough to do, Things Will Not Go Well. I don’t know why it thinks that since it has been thirty years since I’ve neglected my schooling, and I don’t think I’ve dropped too many balls since then; it just thinks “more is better” and piles it in. I think there’s also a quality of “if I fill every day with lots to do of a positive and/or productive nature, I don’t have to think about the really awful things in the world” and I’m not sure that’s a bad thing. Thus far the only negative impact of this approach has been the occasional overextension, and the occasional crash that comes after fixing that. It doesn’t happen often enough to make me stop, apparently. I’m not typically over-extended, just… extended.

Privacy

Bobbie1 Comment

Firstly, and this is super depressing to write, understand that you will never be 100% private, and that privacy is also a never ending game. Everything we do online has an electronic trail that leads back to us and relies on the infrastructure of the entities we interact with to keep us private. In most cases – and especially when we are using “free” services – *we* are the product.

DeleteMe

Deleteme is a service you pay for that identifies how much of your personal information is out there for use/abuse, and helps you remove it: search engine results, data brokers (these are the companies that purchase from like Facebook and Amazon all kinds of data about you, and then they marry it up with other data they’ve gathered), and things like public records (e.g., why you can search someone’s name and see them on White Pages, Spokeo, etc.).  Remember the old days when White Pages was a physical book and you picked up your rotary phone to call them to tell them to remove you from the book (okay maybe you don’t but I do)? Those days are gone, and now every site has a different process. Using a service like Deleteme can help streamline that.

That said, there are places where you may want to share information, but only to people you know and like. This could be on Facebook, LinkedIn, whatever. Deleteme won’t delete from what you’ve specified there, and so there are some things you will want to do to make sure that your information only is visible to the people you want to see it.

Social Media

Meta (Facebook, Instagram, Threads)

On Facebook, go to the top right screen, click your avatar, go to Privacy Settings, and there’s a whole menu of things you can do. Here are some recommendations:

  • Identify who can see your profile information (things like your email, birthday, city, who can see your friends, who can see your people and pages, who can see your posts/stories, limiting your past posts, etc.
  • Most of these rely on a curated friend group and someone knowing you’re on Facebook and sending you an invite that you must accept (or direct) before they can see your stuff.
  • The levels are typically: Only Me, Friends, Public, or a curated group

You should then update your Ad topics in account center: this is who gets to advertise to you and what they get for it. Go to “Ad Preferences”, “Manage Info”, which will tell you how your data is used for advertising.

Finally – there is a section where you can view and manage your activities on Meta products. Note that it will have your activities across all Meta products (Facebook, Instagram, Threads) and will give you an idea of what all they track. And if you continue reading, there’s the FBP browser extension that can curb even more.

Instagram and Threads have similar experiences – go to your profile and there is a section that links to your privacy. Remember that unique identifiers are best for people who are trying to invade your privacy: usernames, emails, etc. Keep your email(s) private, and usernames unique, if you want to make it harder (never impossible) for someone to find you.

X/Twitter

X (fka Twitter) has a Privacy & Security section in which you can control your visibility, your post visibility, people’s access to your DM’s, etc.

LinkedIn

Much as with Facebook, on LinkedIn you can lock down to just your network of chosen people, make it so you don’t show up in search results (or only show up for a certain level of “connectedness”, e.g., if you and I know the same person I can see you, but if I know someone who knows someone who knows you, I can’t). You can also specify how LinkedIn uses your data. 

Reddit

One of the very first things that Reddit will tell you in their Privacy Policy is that they are a public platform. Anyone can see your profiles, posts, and comments, meaning that a person with a lot of spare time and access to their API’s could sieve through your post history and look for context clues of who you are (because your username can be blissfully anonymized, like “TigerPanda640” or suchlike. 

Microsoft

Your Microsoft account is likely also tied to your Xbox account or other products, and much as with other providers and platforms you can control some things.

In the Settings & Privacy tab of your Account Overview, and walk through the Privacy “Make sure you’re safe and secure” guide. It will also link you to the different Microsoft product structures (e.g., Xbox, Teams, etc.)

NOTE: much as with Reddit, Xbox handles are public, and so you would want to have a handle that isn’t easily identifiable as you. 

Most Microsoft data visibility is within your organization (so at work, people can see your work email information; at home, only you can see your email information (or your family if you have a family account)). It’s not like there’s a forum in which that information would be scrapable by simple search; for someone to get ahold of this there would have to be an actual security breach of some kind. For that, see “Security” to avoid the impact there.

Apple

Apple is KNOWN for its privacy and security, and much like Microsoft there isn’t a way for someone to get your information *from* Apple unless you shared it out or unless they’ve been breached. Much as with all these other entities, go to your profile, and adjust any privacy/security settings as appropriate.

Google

There are two places to lock down your Google information: one is locking it down from Google (managing your ad settings and activity controls) and the other is locking down your account information (and who can see it, including in product reviews and endorsements. To address that, go to your account, go to Personal Info, and under “choose what others see” select “Go to About Me”. You can see your visibility per information item there and make it private or visible to anyone.

Useful Apps are Useful, but…

Yelp. Open Table, DoorDash. Lyft. Instacart. Any application on your phone that requires you to log in, is getting some kind of data about you and has an account for you. (Even if it doesn’t require a login, that app likely has information about your phone, location, etc. it can get as part of existing on your phone). In your account settings you should be able to update how much is visible to someone (either at the company or as part of an advertiser). 

Other Websites

There will be sites you *want* your image on – a local foundation, board service, etc. – that you cannot lock down (because that would defeat the purpose of visibility). For these, there are a few things you can do, though it would be hard to enforce:

  • Use a unique picture. In the old days someone could take a picture, reverse image search, and find everywhere else that picture is used, to draw a connection to different places a person works/does work. (They can still do this). However, with AI, they could now use that picture to extrapolate similar other pictures so the picture no longer has to be exact to trace you. 
  • See if the information can be behind a log in (e.g., if it’s board information, require membership to log in)
  • Use an avatar instead of a picture (this… can feel unprofessional)
  • Use abbreviations of names (e.g., B. Conti or Bobbie C) – small roadblocks can be useful. 
  • Do not have emails useable on a website. E.g., instead of bobbie.conti@gmail.com, which can be picked up and read by a scraping machine (and useful for creating a spam attack), you can list it as bobbie.conti, on gmail.
  • Website owners can make things a little easier by requiring verification of humanity and actual enrollment for newsletters – e.g., when someone “signs up” for their newsletter, they should send a confirmation request/update to the email address *before* actually signing them into the email service. I love websites that do this because it makes it harder for people to use them in spam attacks.

Nom Nom Nom on your Data: Cookies

Cookies are little trackers that websites drop onto your local machine. If you log in to a website on your PC, and then on your phone, it’s dropped cookies in both places as relates to your log in (if you had one) or any number of other log ins (if they’re affiliated with say, Facebook). This means that when you go back to the site six days later, it can go to your cookies file and read all of the cookies in that file: and it will know things like what other sites you’ve been to, what you looked at, etc.

“Cookies” and your “cookie hygiene” are what comes into play when you go to a website and it gives you that “Accept All”, “Reject All”, and then typically a setting where you can “pick”.  The options are typically:

  • Functional – these you typically cannot opt out of, and they will help convey information to the site owner about issues with their site, performance, etc.
  • Experiential – these are things they track like your preferred products, pages, etc. 
  • Advertising/Marketing  – these are things like tracking what specific things you looked at and marrying it up with other data to either infer what you would like (target advertising to you) or to have other sites use (so they can target advertising to you). 

You can, for example, reject all cookies out of hand. You can also go through and clean out “cookie deposits” on your machines. Because cookies are dropped and used by a browser, the instructions on how to remove them are browser specific:

  • Edge
    • Go to Settings, Privacy, Clear Browsing Data, click Control and Shift and Delete at the same time. 
  • Safari
    • Go to Settings & Preferences, go to your Privacy tab, click Manage Website Data or Clear History and Website Data, select Remove All (or pick which sites), and click Remove Now or Delete to Confirm.
    • You can also select to block all cookies, and prevent cross-site tracking.
  • Chrome
    • On Chrome, at top right, click More (with the vertical 3 dots), and select Delete Browsing Data. Choose a time range (last hour, all time etc.) and specify which information you want to remove. 
    • Click Delete Data.
  • Duck Duck Go
    • Duck Duck Go doesn’t store cookies and cache.
  • FireFox
    • Click on the menu button (the three horizontal lines), select Preferences or Options, go to the Privacy and Security panel, in the Cookies and Site Data section, click “Clear Data”. You can elect to clear cookies, site data, or both.

Shields Up or Shields Breached: Browser Extensions

Browser extensions can help or hurt, depending on which browsers and which extensions. A Browser extension is software that will extend the functionality of your browser: it is supposed to add helpful things. These are things like password managers, social media tools, and ad blockers.

Helpful Extensions

  •  Fluff Busting Purity – this will remove Facebook’s ability to track you and spam you with ads. It hides sponsored posts, suggested posts, newsfeed posts from unknown authors, allows you to give it specific phrases for topics to avoid, etc.
  • Ghostery is a web privacy extension that blocks trackers, ads, and can opt you out of automatic cookie dumping (aka “never consent”)
  • Bitwarden has a browser extension for ease of access to your vault.

Generally speaking, most beneficial/altruistic extensions operate on donations (e.g., FB Purity and Ghostery do), and so it’s nice to slide a few dollars their way (if you can).

Private Messaging

There are a variety of messenger services out there, including iMessage (which comes with an iphone), regular SMS texting, WhatsApp, and Signal. WhatsApp and Signal offer double-ended encryption, meaning that, in theory, there is encryption on your device and encryption on the recipient’s device, and the intermediary (the messenging service) cannot access or decrypt your messages (they’d have to have access to both phones). That said, there is evidence that WhatsApp has a “back door” – the recipient of any message can flag it, and once that message is flagged it is copied and sent to Facebook/Meta for review. This means that there is nothing stopping WhatsApp from “self flagging” a message for perusal).

Instead, I advocate Signal. Signal is end to end encrypted, there is no evidence of a back door, and Signal has stated *in court* that it has no way of decrypting messages (nor will it build a back door to support that). Signal is also supported via donation.

App Hygiene

When you download an app to your phone, especially an iPhone, it runs you through a bunch of questions and may include Terms and Conditions. The biggest things it will ask you, though is:

  • Is it allowed access to your camera and microphone?
  • Is it allowed access to your photo library?
  • Is it allowed access to your contacts?
  • Is it allowed access to your location?

iPhones

Each of the privacy settings above are available in the individual app menu: go to Settings, scroll down to Apps, select which app you’re interested in.

You can: 

  • Set location usage to “always”, “while using”, and “never” (and if an app is using your location it will have the little location arrow showing purple or outlined). Some also have “Ask next time or when I share”.
  • Set access to photos (None, limited access (where you select which ones), Full access)
  • Microphone and Camera are typically toggles.
  • Contacts offer None, Limited (select users), Full access.

Android

To review the privacy settings on an Android Phone, go to Settings, App, the specific app, and then Permissions. Mostly you can toggle between allow and don’t allow. 

Sniff Sniff

Let’s say you’ve done the above – you’ve locked down your socials, you’ve used deleteme – the barn doors are closed! Except there’s a window, and that window is you out in the world with your computer – let’s close that window.

  • “Free Wifi” isn’t free, and it could be problematic. When you use your machine to connect to free wifi, you are giving up some measure of information about your machine and also what you are doing – they can get your IP address/MAC address (basically, they have an identifier for that machine/you), they can see what sites you go to (yes even in incognito mode), etc. They don’t see your passwords, but they would be able to infer from the collection of data over time (and marrying it up with that broker data) who you are and what you do and where you go. 
  • Use a VPN on your machines if you’re in public – yes, this is a pain and yes, you have to pay for it. A good one is Nord VPN. This establishes a secure network and so while you would be able to join the “free” wifi, the sharing of your IP address, visibility into what sites you go to, etc. is gone. 
  • Do not plug into public USB ports to charge your phones or any device. Instead, get a USB Condom (yes it’s called that). A USB condom looks like a little USB “bridge” that has one end you stick YOUR USB into, and the other end you stick into the “free” power port.  USB condoms work by shorting the data pins and only allowing the power pins to work on a USB connection.

Doxing

Doxing is rooted in the phrase “dox” which in turn is a bastardization of “docs” which is essentially the idea that someone has all your docs/documentation. In practical terms, if someone says they have been “doxed” or “doxxed”, or will “dox” you, what they are doing/have done is assembled enough information about you that they can blab to the world that User123 is in fact Princess Buttercup who lives at 642 Florin Way, Fire Swamp, Guilder, Fantasyland, and her phone number is 555-867-5309 and her IP is (insert rando ip address here). Someone “doxing” you means they know where you are and who you are and can publish that information, and it is an actual threat to your safety.

Here’s the thing to understand about doxing:

  1. Some people can actually do it, 
  2. Most people threaten to do it but don’t actually do it,
  3. Once you have been doxed it is very hard to get private again.

If you have set your stuff to private, used pseudonyms where you can, avoided posting anything publicly, used deleteme, etc. etc., it should be very hard to dox you. Doxing takes a lot of effort for a hobbyist and practically none for a hacker, but most hackers do not want to dox you they just want your money – so lock down your passwords and use at least 2 factor authentication on your bank accounts and rotate your credentials regularly.

Avoiding Doxxing

The person who wants to dox you on a public forum is a sad pathetic cretin who has nothing better to do in their life than make other people miserable because then maybe they can feel something. Doxers get off on the power trip of “I know who you are” and so there are two ways to combat this:

  • Yea, and??
    • This method (the it’s okay if you know who I am) is only good if you are reasonably sure of your physical security and circumstances – if you are living off the grid in remote Montana and surrounded by security cameras and a moat with sharks with laser beams attached to their heads, well, then that works just fine.
      • Alternatively, if you’re reasonably sure that someone would not have a real-world grudge against you then the likelihood that anyone would do anything with that data is small. But. That relies on rational actors, and we have precious few of those these days.
      • This is not “Come at me, Bro”. This is “all of the information you have/had is publicly available anyway and I am reasonably sure of my physical security”.
  • Locking down your stuff to make it hard.
    • See all of the stuff above. Use pseudonyms, don’t share your email address (or have a “spamhole” email address – I use my gmail for this – and then a separate one that is your “real people use this” and maybe a third for “this is my banking stuff email”), post privately, curate your audience.
    • Do Not Engage with Trolls.
      • Don’t get into online pissing contests in forums with people who are clearly escalating and/or not hearing it.
      • Leave the Chat

If you have been Doxed or are Threatened with Doxing

First, Don’t panic. Panic will not serve you now… force that panic down, get a cold glass of water, and if it helps to think about you leaping into action to help a friend, then do that. 

  • Document – screenshot the discourse, save emails, identify what was said, who said it, their username/handle, any identifying information you have about them, what they did or did not say they had done or would do, and how much information they have disclosed already.
  • Go back and clean your stuff – if you missed something or if there is any indication of where they got that information from, go back and see if you can further lock it down.
    • If you can, it will prevent others from using it.
    • If you can’t, it’s something to inform the site owners in terms of a privacy/ security hole.
  • Report the incident to whichever platform the doxing occurred on (e.g., if on Reddit someone says they’re going to dox you, report it to Reddit) and occurred from (e.g., if that Redditor says they found your info on Facebook, also report it to Facebook). Keep copies of your reports, date and time sent, and any replies you get.
  • Call in the law. Depending on the nature of the doxing you may want to involve your local police, sheriff, and or the FBI.  This has twofold purpose: one, is you may need their help for this (especially if this includes any sort of physical threat), but secondly, a popular pastime of some doxers is to “swat” your house (this is where they anonymously call in an incident at your house and the SWAT team shows up earnestly; if you’ve been doxed and you let them know you’ve been doxed they will be prepared to address it.
  • Get legal help. Doxing is also a form of harassment, and because it can lead to physical consequences (Even if the person *doing the doxing* wasn’t the one threatening physical harm – usually there’s one troll to share the information and one or more trolls to do something with that information), you want legal help in pursuing the doxer (if you can).

Other Things to Think About

How People Can Find You

  • Do you have a personalized plate? Does your car have lots of identifying stickers (e.g., “proud parent of a child at XYZ School”)
  • Do you have a blog?
  • Do you have a business *in your name*? Registered to your home address?
  • Are you prominently featured on one or more public websites?
  • Do you own property in your name (most public assessor’s sites are linked from Zillow, for example, and so addresses can be “backed in” to people’s names).
  • Google yourself. You’d be surprised. I’m on a registry for my son’s high school PTA from four years ago.
  • If you share photos, understand that every photo is by default encoded with metadata about where and when it was taken. That metadata can travel with the photo: in your iPhone, select any photo, and then slowly scroll up while touching the photo: you will see the date, time, what camera took it, what size the photo was, and so forth. If you share a photo, you’re going to share that metadata too. You can strip it from the photo before sharing it, and you can set your photo app on your phone to not include information like location data.

Perspective

You may find yourself – as I do, writing this – trying to do the risk assessment on privacy. After all, I have a personalized plate, I have property in my name, all of my social media handles (with the exception of Reddit and Xbox) are essentially my name and I have 15 years of blogging under my name with a personalized domain. Detaching myself from all of that would be a huge pain if not impossible. There are still things I do though: I secure my stuff, have a spamhole email, use Bitwarden, use USB condoms, etc. If a hacker is going to read through 15 years of posting history to glean information about me what they will find is that I am too hung up on work, I’m neurotic, I have an internet addiction that is useful, and occasionally I “enjoy” testing my physical capabilities. 

Risk has three elements:

  • What could go wrong?
  • How bad would it be if it did?
  • How likely is it to happen?

(Benefit also has the same calculation and so to illustrate that I will use a positive example):

  • What could go right? I could win the lottery.
  • How good would it be if I did? Pretty darned good!
  • How likely is it to happen? Extremely unlikely as I don’t often buy tickets.

Therefore, preparing for a lottery win, while it sounds like a fun distraction, is probably not useful.

Now the less fun side:

  • What could go wrong? I could get doxed on Reddit.
  • How bad would it be if it did? Not sure. Most of what I’ve posted are comments about sewing techniques or gardening. But they could find my reddit handle and attribute it to me, and maybe have my name and address and personal email to share. That said:
    • My address is already available by a property records search and/or white pages.I have four emails (active, two dormant) and depending on which one they share I make that one the spam hole one (if it isn’t already) and have to spend a tedious afternoon rewiring things.
    • If they show up at my house (or threaten to show up at my house) things would be problematic and for that I would engage law enforcement and probably an attorney.
  • How likely is it to happen? Also not sure. Most of what I post is banal, but I am associated with things that would make a certain factor in our society upset (love that for them), and so… I don’t know. I’m a mere Board Member, but one cannot plumb the depths of stupid mixed with malice. So to address a *potential* likelihood, I do some of the prudent things.

There is no foolproof way to avoid privacy/security/doxing issues, but there are steps you can take. 

Security

Bobbie1 Comment

It’s important to understand that the personal security space – that is, how you lock down your stuff – is a constant game of whack a mole. “For each fine cat, a fine rat” – as you close down some things, enterprising bad actors will find new ways in. Your very best option is to approach it as defense in depth by using multiple interventions to make it harder for them. Think of it like Swiss cheese slices: a single slice of Swiss cheese has many holes. Putting one slice of Swiss cheese on another limits the visibility of some holes but not others. Stacking a bunch of pieces of Swiss cheese will further close more holes.

This is a compilation of what I recommend for individuals and their (mostly cyber) security. A second post on Privacy is forthwith.

First, let’s get some terminology straight:

  • Security is the ability to ensure that we have Authentication and Authorization (AuthN and AuthZ). 
    • Authentication = we can verify you are really you. Examples are when you use a password and then get a code to your phone you have to enter, or have a PIN code to use, or a passphrase.
    • Authorization = once we know you are you, are you even allowed to be here and what are you allowed to do? For example, you can authenticate into your bank website as you, but you are not authorized to see anyone else’s stuff.
  • Privacy is the ability to ensure that ONLY authorized people get to see personal information (also known as PII, or Personal Identifying Information), and the person doing that authorization is the owner of the data (namely, you). 

Security Basics

The reality is there are a variety of different ways to secure things, and they are not employed consistently – so for example some sites have you authenticate in using your email, others require you to create a username. Some will send your second factor of authentication ONLY to a phone text, others will do email, still others will require or support an authentication app on your phone (and yet others will allow you to use a physical USB key you carry around with you). There are also “passkeys”, which are where a unique encryption is stored half on your machine and half on the server for the site you’re using, so unless someone has you, your machine, and that website, they can’t get in as you.

That said, there are some standardized ways to keep your stuff secure (or more secure):

  • Do not re-use passwords. I know, it’s tempting. But all it takes is someone getting ahold of one email/password combination, and they can feed that into a program and have it try a million different places to see what else they can get in to. There are password vaults that will create unique strong passwords for your sites, or you can use a pattern (a friend of mine uses album names and song names).
  • Regularly update your passwords. Passwords get leaked and stolen and bought.
  • Use a Password vault. I use Bitwarden.  Much like Apple’s Passwords, it will securely house your passwords, passkeys, etc. and will also tell you if that password is reused anywhere, and if it has been found on the dark web (where passwords are bought and sold). 
  • If you can use an authentication app, do so. It gets rid of the vulnerability that may happen if someone has access to your texts or emails.
  • Especially for banking stuff: you can set your communication preferences to tell you if a transaction more than $x has happened, or if someone has logged into your account.
  • Don’t click links in a text and be equally careful of links in email. If you get a “text” from GoodToGo, or your bank, or whatever, instead go directly to the website you know is theirs, and log in as you. If you don’t recognize the number, or if when you hover over the email “name” it’s an entirely different address (or the formatting is off, or there are misspellings, wonky grammar, or an inflated sense of urgency), do not click.
  • Have a separate email account for your banking/super important stuff, and your “shopping/etc” stuff. Online retailers can and often do sell your data and/or exploit cookie allowance for that purpose, so separate your concerns.
  • Do your security updates regularly: most of the iPhone updates you get (iPad, MAC, Windows, etc.) include a poop-ton of security patches and fixes and the longer you take to do your updates the longer you are leaving your barn doors open.
  • If you get a “here’s your code for logging in” *and you didn’t log in*, go to the website (open a fresh browser page and go there, don’t click on any links in the mail just in case), log in, see if anything has been messed with (especially for a bank account), *change the password immediately*, and notify the site owner via the site or the phone number on the site that you got a 2FA notification you did not ask for. Work with the site’s fraud department to address anything weird.

Secure your Credit and Identity

There are other things you should do to secure your credit and your information:

  • Freeze your credit with all three agencies (prevents anyone from using your data to open new credit lines/cards). Those three are Equifax, Experian, and TransUnion.
  • If you suspect your identity has been compromised and that someone is trying to or has used your social security information fraudulently, go to identitytheft.gov to report it and further lock down your information.

There are also subscription services you can use to monitor your credit and your identity for potential theft: oftentimes when you are notified of a data breach, the legal requirement is, at minimum, the breached party offer you this monitoring for one year for free. 

Securing your Networks and Devices

As we all know by now, all incognito mode spares you is someone identifying which pages you’ve visited when you lend them your browser — it doesn’t shield your internet provider from seeing them, or even your router. You’ll want to lock down who can see what.

  • Use a VPN where you can – VPN stands for Virtual Private Network and it means that from your machine to the machine your machine is talking to (‘cos the internet’s a series of tubes), the “tube” is locked on either end. More to the point, your cellular service, internet service provider, etc. do not get to see what you’re looking at or what you’re doing.
  • Avoid using Free Wifi, or make sure to use a VPN if/when you do. Remember that if something is “free”, you are the product.
  • Use USB condoms wherever you can. Those “free chargers” are not really free and can be infected with junk; USB condoms short the two data pins in a USB connection to allow for “just power”. You’re better off bringing your own charging block tho.
  • Secure your Router – change the default password to a strong one (the Admin password and the access password, each). Enable encryption (WPA2 or WPA3), and make sure you do your security patches for the router firmware.
  • If you have “Smart anything” in your home: put it on a separate network from your computers/phones that you bank/do business on; make sure all the Smart gadgets have *separate passwords* (your Smart TV and your Smart Fridge should have different passwords, for example).

Next Up: Privacy.

DMV Beige

BobbieLeave a comment

I want you to imagine a color, a very specific color, that I think most US-based folks would recognize and it may have an international bent (I haven’t been to the motor vehicle licensing offices in other countries). This color is that sad, slightly icky beige color reminiscent of the transitional period of the 70’s to the 80’s where not everything was yet Duran Duran and you still had smokey glass tumblers and “non-smoking” sections in restaurants were new. It’s the kind of beige with no redeeming qualities- it’s not Indiana Jones Adventuring Beige, it’s not Tasteful Coat Beige, it’s not even Mid-Century Modern Influencer Revival Beige. This is that Beige of No Redeeming Attraction that can sometimes still be found on the walls of your local DMV (or other underfunded government office).

Yesterday I was feeling very DMV Beige.

I am *not* very good at discussing strong feelings because feelings are not logical, and they don’t follow a predictive pattern. When they happen, I end up having a “retrospective” to try to figure out why they happened. Nevertheless, I have them, they will surface. Yesterday I found myself talking with some good friends at work about feeling “beige” and… they got it. It resonated. A lot of us are feeling “beige”.

Beige isn’t bad, per se. You wouldn’t pick it on purpose, at least not this irredeemable beige. You’ve heard about “beige flags” and such and this is its cousin: the idea that “everything’s fine” but somehow it could be better and/or worse; it’s this liminal, waiting room feeling.

After noodling on this with a fellow engineering friend, we came upon a hypothesis: this feeling is appropriate and also going to happen a lot more. She and I both have A Lot Going On both personally and professionally, and those Lots Going On tend to be of an urgent and complicated nature. There are often fires, emergencies, or confrontations that have to be had to further the product (or to keep it alive). There are translations, meetings, “per my last email”, and “I think you’ll find that…”. This is not limited to our work lives but also to the complications of personal lives as you get to a certain age and stage (family members passing and estates must be settled, the additional attention your health requires as you advance, etc.). We’ve both been underwater on both fronts for so long that now, as we are bobbing on the surface and we see the rescue boat coming, we’re wondering if there’s a shark somewhere.

If you’re conditioned to be hypervigilant and constantly alert for a problem to solve, and no problem (that you can solve) presents itself, then what remains are the problems that exist and that *you cannot solve*. For an engineer, or any “go-doer”, this is problematic. Maybe it’s because you do not have authority to solve the problem, maybe it’s because you do not have the ability or technological understanding to solve the problem, and/or maybe it’s not necessarily *your* problem at all (but someone else’s), and the bias to action drives one part of your brain whilst the other part of your brain screams at it to stop wasting time and energy because surely, surely a You Problem will come along soon and you’ll need your energy for that.

There is no shortage of problems to be aware of and feel inadequate or unable to solve or even subdue them. Which problems those are and how focused or personal they feel are largely determined by where you live and what 24/7 news hysteria cycle you consume. I say “hysteria” not in a dismissive tone – real news is real news – but the objective McNeil Lehr News Hour/ 60 Minutes that I grew up with is gone and replaced with Alternative Facts and non-neutral phrasing like “crushed” and “slammed” and “outrage” and such. Curating the inbound flow is almost a job in and of itself – I mean yes, you can tweak your algorithms and provide feedback to the “machine”, but the machine doesn’t feed off of you feeling happy or even content.

It feeds off of you feeling sad, angry, outraged, or any number of negative emotions. The very *best* you can hope for, on some days, is that all it wants is to feed off you feeling DMV Beige.

Now What, Part II

Bobbie3 Comments

We’ve discussed before of what to do when you’re facing a layoff/Reduction In Force (RIF). It would appear that “the market” has decided the latest vogue is to do straight firing, based on “performance”. I put those in scare quotes because there is no small amount of evidence that some folks being let go for “performance” were under the impression– with receipts — that they were not under any form of performance improvement plan and/or had stellar reviews. Even if you were, being let go with no warning and no health insurance sucks. So let’s do this:

  1. Take a deep breath. Panic will not serve you now; and the energy you used to put into your job you now need to put into YOU. If you need to take a moment to scream into a pillow or sob in the shower or make a little felt voodoo doll, well, do you. Don’t take too long, because there’s more to do.
  2. Are you covered for health insurance? E.g., do you have a spouse and can they cover you on theirs? If you’re under 26 you may be able to be covered by your parents. Being let go (for whatever reason) is a “qualifying event”. If not, check out your state’s health insurance exchange. (If that doesn’t work, type your state name and “health insurance” into your browser… because that previous link is a federal government link and some of the sites are being “updated” lately).
  3. Different states have different rules for unemployment – in some there’s a waiting period if you’ve been “fired”, in others it “depends”. Put your state name into your browser along with “unemployment” and follow the links on how to file and what is needed. Do your best to NOT be emotionally compromised during this, you’re going to need patience. I find it useful to pretend it’s not for me, but for my kid or my mom. How would I advocate for them? Then I do that.
  4. Review whatever paperwork they gave you as part of your “firing”. What happens with your 401k, your pension, etc. … when does your last check drop – make a note of that too.
  5. If your insurance covers you “through the month” or suchlike, get an emergency appointment with your doc (if you can) and refill all your prescriptions, etc. Insurance goes by date of care.
  6. Take a look at your budget at home and, if you don’t have one, now’s the time. You need a hard list of the things you cannot NOT pay (like rent, food, utilities) and things you can cut out if you need to (like subscription services, dining out, etc.). Will it suck? Yes. But let’s get with Maslow on this one: needs first. Then figure out the gaps.
  7. Time for some math: you have whatever’s in your account, plus possibly an inbound “last check”. That “account” balance may include your emergency fund (this, friend, is an emergency) or you may not have one. Take that into account, along with how long before you can get unemployment, and compare that to your budget – are you going to be in the hole, and if so how much? (Then start trying to figure out what you can do to bridge the hole: how fast can you get a new job (any job), where can you pull cash from to bridge the gap, etc.). You can also negotiate with companies as to payment plans and hardship stays.
  8. Brush up that resume, your LinkedIn, etc. Network. Have informational “coffees” with people. Scour the job boards (e.g. Indeed).
  9. Have your talking points ready as to why you were let go. If you have references from coworkers, previous managers, etc., have those at the ready. Those employers know the score and they watch the news too: this is not necessarily a scarlet letter.
  10. This too shall pass. It’s going to absolutely suck, but you’re resilient, and you can do this.